Do you remember the scene from Finding Nemo where the seagulls all start saying “Mine! Mine! Mine!”? This is what I see and hear when people ask when baby #2 is coming. “Baby #2? Will you have another? Do you think you’ll have another?” It’s never-ending. And, to be honest, a bit frustrating.
Why do people think it’s okay to constantly ask this question? We’ve just experienced a traumatic birth. A second baby is the last thing on our minds. We have always said that we want two kids, but right now we can’t really see past today with Nellie-Anne.
I cry when I think about having a second baby. Will we make it full term? Will I go into preterm labor again? And if those things do happen, will that baby be okay? Will that baby get sick like Nell did? Everyone tells me that I have to be positive. But, if you’ve experienced this you know why that is such a difficult thing to do.
Last night I told Bryan that if we were going to have another baby we would need to wait until Nell was caught up with her development, which they say doesn’t happen until 18-24 months. There is a lot happening with her right now. We’ve been referred to Inland Regional Center (IRC). They provide services for preemie babies to help them with their development. This includes services like speech therapy, occupational therapy, etc. So far, we’ve had a virtual evaluation done for Nell. The ladies we met with looked at the things she could or couldn’t do. Does she bring her hands midline? How much neck control does she have? Does she like tummy time? Is she a happy baby? Question after question after question.
They will present this into to the IRC and they will determine whether or not Nell qualifies for certain services. They’ll need to see at lest a 33% delay in one or more areas for this to happen. We don’t know what this means yet. This is a weird time for everyone and that means that this gets delayed because they can’t physically be with Nellie.
We aren’t sure what this will mean yet, but we’re confident that Nellie is going to develop perfectly. And if she does end up need services we’re grateful that we have access to those resources for her.